Monday 24 May 2010

THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE VIDEO GAME



So maybe you loved director Tom Six’s built-to-shock body horror opus The Human Centipede, or maybe you skipped it, entirely unimpressed with the idea of seeing three humans attached butt-to-face to create the title insect. Either way, now, thanks to the geniuses at I-Mockery, you can wallow in Dr. Dieter Laser’s ugly universe while pretending it’s all just a game… an ‘80s video game, that is.

Behold, Human Centipede - The Video Game, modeled after the popular arcade classic, in which the lovely day-glo bugs of old have been replaced by Tom Six's ultimate fantasy-- a human centipede made of not three, but 12 or more victims stitched together at the extremities to form one long would-be insect of unparalleled terror. Now those poor bastards from the movie have been dehumanized into pixels so you won’t have to worry about their pain and degradation, not to mention their bathroom habits. But you'll be too consumed with blasting them out of existence before they can descend on you and get their icky bodily fluids all over your mouse and keyboard to fret much about their sorry surgical predicament anyway! Plus, now that I have this keen video game, I feel even more excused from having to actually see the movie. Video game fun with a public service! That definitely goes sharpening your hand-eye coordination one better, not to mention that you don't need to waste a shitload of quarters playing it! I will try to avoid thinking about what it says about me that I’m far better at this version than I ever was with the original.

(Thanks be to Movieline for the tip!)

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